1397's my lucky number I'm so afraid that I will go to jail I had nothing to do with the murder So why should I have to moan and wail? I didn't do what you said that I did All these people treating me like a kid All this stress making me flip my damn lid But all this internet shit is stupid I think I'm gonna take a break I'm gonna take a break from my life now (from my life now) It's over now, it's over now, I just wanna get out Take me to a place, where I can feel safe It's over now, it's over now, I just wanna move out Take me to a place where the CPS won't bust open my safe! I just wanna leave you with this one piece of advice Don't trust your friends if they act too damn nice Cos they'll break in your house and infect you with head lice And all I wanna do, is sit back and watch the tube All I wanna do, is sit back and play some tunes And eat some chicken and rice.

I just lost my best friend today She doesn't think that I am gay I just lost my best of best friends It's such a shame it had to end. Turning, yearning Learning, burning The world's on fire He go, ego Evil, lethal The Daily Wire Your life is a lie too Ain't nothing we can do Your life is a lie too And so fuck you Hoo! Hoo! Hoo! Hoo! Leaving, breathing Sending, receiving The world's a phone line I go, I know Eye roll, high note It's beer and wine Your life is a lie too Ain't nothing we can do Your life is a lie too And so fuck you Hoo! Hoo! Hoo! Hoo! I wanna keep in touch with my past life In Latvian, ass nazis means sharp knife I know I don't watch a lot of cable TV But my favorite TV show is Community I've been such a dirty boy Playing with my dirty toys How have you been tonight? I haven't been alright Your life is a lie too Ain't nothing we can do Your life is a lie too And so fuck you Your life is a lie too (Hoo!) Your life is a lie too (Hoo!) Your life is a lie too (Hoo!) Your life is a lie too (Hoo!) Your life is a lie too.

Who am I right now? I'm gonna blow my brains out Why am I still here? I'm gonna simply disappear I'm gonna sing some suicidal shit To appeal to suicidal kids When you're so fucking lazy you can't get up When you're so fucking crazy you think you're fucked I might as well throw my phone over the rocks Cos the world's too hard for me Please let me escape I feel like I am getting raped But it's not that bad I just feel like I'm going mad I'm gonna say some emo angsty shit To appeal to all the angry kids When you're so fucking lazy you can't get up When you're so fucking crazy you think you're fucked I might as well call the motherfucking cops Cos the world's too hard for me I live my life in fear You don't know what it's like out there Someone's gonna come to the front door and call my name, Things will never be the same after that I don't want to be So scared in today's society I'm so relieved The police haven't got to me yet All I want to do is live In a world that doesn't forget or forgive When you're so fucking lazy you can't get up When you're so fucking crazy you think you're fucked When you're so fucking lazy you can't get up When you're so fucking crazy you think you're fucked

No, no, I shouldn't be the same I need something drastic to help me change The Beatles are my life force and Weezer is my oxygen My favorite drink is Sprite and my favorite food is ramen Yeah, yeah, I can't deal with my life I need someone to help me with this strife I need someone to help me set my life straight And who cares if I'm bi or I'm lesbian or if I'm gay I wanna move to Vermont It's where I feel I belong That's, where, I think I'd find some peace A change of scenery would get the misery to cease A change of scenery is always nice Their lifestyle sounds so peaceful, I would like a slice I, want, to move to the East Coast Enjoy some maple syrup on some buttered toast Then I'd work part time in a gay or a lesbian bar I'd work for the LGBT police, and I would drive a gay lesbian car I wanna move to Vermont It's where I feel I belong If I was already in Vermont I wouldn't be singing this song You told me to turn my records down You never said that before So I'll just take the needle off the groove Now it's not playing anymore! Please don't leave me alone by myself I can't live like everybody else I need time to find some peace (twinkle twinkle little star) I want this misery to cease (how I wonder what you are) Why are you so concerned With my sexuality That's none of your goddamn business, mother That's on my penis and me I need some time away from the people closest to me I need some time, and privacy I need some time to express my sexuality I need some time to let me be

CHRIS PLANTE: "I mean, I just, I marvel, still... the basic facts are so damning, and so obviously corrupt, that I marvel that these charlatans can pretend to be in the news business, and that the organizations they work for can pretend to be news organizations. The president should look at their FCC licenses, because there's a public interest proviso in the FCC licensing, and if you're not serving the public interest you're gonna have your FCC license pulled and no longer allowed to broadcast. You know, the LEFT - yeah, and Bobama, remember Anita Dunn, and uh... and, who is that creep "Fox News is the enemy of the American people" Democrat congressman that was-- Alan Grayson! Very good, that's right, he's no longer in Congress. He was- he was crooked too, what he crooked? He's crooked, yep... he's crooked." The right only makes the left look bad The left only makes the right look bad So to hell with the right and to hell with the left I'm already in enough personal stress The right only makes the left look bad The left only makes the right look bad So to hell with the left and to hell with the right I hate having to constantly hear about the fights I know I'm not asking for much When I say that we need peace and love You all make me sick to my stomach Oh my God, now you've really done it Do you really know how dumb you sound? Listen back to the words coming out of your mouth CHRIS PLANTE: "And then they call it 'Fux [sic] News conspiracy theories'. It's on camera! There's no question that he got the job, is there? Allie? Allie? Stefie? Chunk? Any of you clowns? Really, I mean, you pretend to be- I'm like 50 times the journalist they are, and I'm- and I left the business years ago. But my standards are much higher than theirs, much much higher!" The left only smear campaigns the right The right only smear campaigns the left So to hell with the right and to hell with the left I'm already in enough personal stress The right only smear campaigns the left The left only smear campaigns the right So to hell with the left and to hell with the right I'm so fucking tired of hearing all the fights! You all make me sick to my stomach Oh my God, now you've really done it Do you know how much I want to die? Don't poison me with all of your lies! CHRIS PLANTE: "Uh, and speaking of, uh, lying... Bernie Sanders had a heart attack. He's 78 years old, he's a socialist, he vacationed and honeymooned in the Soviet Union; uh, his adoring wife bankrupted that college for the first time in American history, I think. Uh, they have three homes, and - this my... friend Marty... I think it was Marty... was it Marty? I think it was Marty - staying over the weekend. Now the only question is, in which of his three residences will the socialist Bernie Sanders be convalescing from his heart attack? And God bless him, I hope he lives to be 120 - uh, he's gonna continue to be wrong about everything all day long - but I don't wish him any harm. I just wish they'd wake up and... you know, smell the 20th century." (Charles, I need you to put the canopy up, we gotta go right now.) Dad, I feel weak. (I don't care, put the canopy up, we're leaving and your sister and stepmom can't do it themselves.) Dad, you're sexist. (Fine, gimme that.) Dad, what are you doing? (Nyeh!) DAD, YOU THREW MY PHONE! YOU ASSHOLE! (Not so weak now, are ya?) To harass To humiliate To belittle To intimidate I'm your dog Tell me what to do Tell me to put my hands behind my back And I'll submit to you OFFICER, I'LL DO WHAT YOU SAY I'LL PAY ANY FEES OR FINES I HAVE TO PAY AND THEN WHEN THAT DUMB SHIT IS ALL DONE YOU'LL THROW ME ON THE GROUND, AND TASE ME JUST FOR FUN SO BEAT ME UP, BEAT ME UP I'M YOUR CIVILIAN BITCH SO SHOOT ME UP, SHOOT ME UP THROW ME IN A DITCH P O L I C E B R U T A L I T Y CHRIS PLANTE: "It's like Damien Thorn, you know the movie, The Omen. I always made this comparison during Obama too. Obama's like Damien Thorn, all the Democrats are like Damien Thorn, it's the empire of Satan, and..." Got a 30 pack in a plastic sack A 30 pack in a plastic sack Got a 30 pack in a plastic sack A 30 pack in a plastic sack [etc] You all make me sick to my stomach Oh my God, now you've really done it Do you know why I want to kill myself Go smear campaign against somebody else! CHRIS PLANTE: "Because the setup put Manafort to the exclusion of all the Democrats in Ukraine. I guess they were planting their flag. You know, like Neil Armstrong on the moon. Sorry, that was Sheila Jackson Lee, thought that Neil Armstrong planted the flag on Mars... Mars... Mars... Period! Period, period!" "You're listening to the Chris Plante Show."

what? molly was a good girl molly molly was a good girl molly molly was a molly was a molly molly molly molly molly was a good girl molly molly was a good girl molly molly was a molly was a molly molly molly molly molly was a good girl molly molly was a good girl molly molly was a molly was a molly molly molly molly molly was a good girl molly molly was a good girl molly molly was a molly was a molly molly molly molly (ow!) mean it's not what i say it's what i mean it's not what i say it's what i mean it's not what i say it's what i mean it's not what i say it's what i mean it's not what i say it's what i mean it's not what i say it's what i mean it's not what i say it's what i mean it's not what i say it's what i mean it's not what i say it's what i mean it's not what i say it's what i mean it's not what i say it's what i mean it's not what i say it's what i molly was a good girl molly molly was a good girl molly molly was a molly was a molly molly molly molly molly was a good girl molly molly was a good girl molly molly was a molly was a molly molly molly molly (LMLYP) (one two three four) got a weasel its a teazel my pleasel my pleasel got a weasel (jumped in the car nuclear wheels) got a weasel its a teazel my pleasel my pleasel got a weasel (send something to show me the plenum weasel) got a weasel its a teazel my pleasel my pleasel got a weasel (he pulled this big weasel out) weasel teazel pleasel pleasel got a weasel its a teazel my pleasel i found a love (yes) CANTIFLAS WAS A BODY ROCKER CANTIFLAS BODY ROCKER CANTIFLAS WAS A BODY ROCKER CANTIFLAS BODY ROCKER IT'S WHAT I MEAN NOT WHAT I SAY IT'S WHAT I MEAN NOT WHAT I SAY IT'S WHAT I MEAN NOT WHAT I SAY IT'S WAHT I MEAN MEAN MEAN MEAN MEAN MEAN MEAN mean it's not what i say it's what i mean it's not what i say it's what i mean it's not what i say it's what i mean it's not what i say it's what i she's a good girl and it felt great to be a liar she's a good girl and it felt great to be a liar she's a good girl and it felt great to be a liar she's a good girl and it felt great to be a liar she's a good girl and it felt great to be a liar she's a good girl and it felt great to be a liar she's a good girl and it felt great to be a liar she's a good girl and it felt great to be a liar she's a good girl (how was i supposed to know) she's a good girl (how was i supposed to know) she's a good girl (how was i supposed to know) she's a good girl (how was i supposed to know) she's a good girl mmmm mmmm mm mmm mmmm mmmm mm mmm mmmm mmmm mm mmm mmmm mmmm mm mmm mmmm mmmm mm mmm mmmm mmmm mm mmm mmmm mmmm mm mmm mmmm mmmm mm mmm molly molly molly molly molly molly... afdagvjuifd i gotta pee man

IN YOUR LEFT EAR: Well, you know, I wouldn't keep anything from my fans! Not even this gorgeous cock! IN THE CENTER: Yes! Yes! Yes! Right there! IN YOUR RIGHT EAR: Hey, look at those faggot-ass clothes! Faggot! Faggot fag! Fuckin fag... (The rest is instrumental)